Disrespectful Child Behavior? Don’t Take It Personally

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By Carole Banks, MSW

If you’ve heard yourself saying things like, “What’s the matter with you? Why are doing this to me?” or “You’re making me crazy,” you’re probably taking your child’s disrespectful behavior personally.

And when you fall into that trap, you begin to assume the worst of your child.

You start to believe he has malicious intentions when he disobeys you, even when he doesn’t.

I think it’s important to stress that everyone personalizes things from time to time, and we all do it for different reasons. Who hasn’t gotten angry at another driver after being cut off in traffic? At certain times, any parent can overreact and take things too personally. And frankly, if your kid is standing there calling you names, it would be hard for anyone not to take that personally.

James Lehman, creator of The Total Transformation® advises the following: “Personalizing inappropriate behavior o ...

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F - Bomb

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By James Lehman, MSW

Swearing is everywhere in our culture. But as parents, you get to decide the culture of your home, and I recommend to all parents to establish a culture of respect and no swearing.

Establish this culture for the sake of a peaceful and respectful home. But also realize that children who know how to act respectfully and speak respectfully are better equipped to deal with the adult world than those who prefer to sound like thugs.

And make sure you understand the difference between swearing and verbal abuse. More about that below.

Know When to Stop the Show

The dialog below plays out in countless homes each night—we know because we hear from these parents all the time:

Parent: “Why didn’t you do ...

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Create a Culture of Accountability in Your Home

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By Megan Devine, LCPC

If you spend much time on EmpoweringParents.com, you’ve probably noticed that we talk a lot about “accountability.” But have you ever wondered what it really means to hold your child accountable? It’s an excellent question, and one that we receive often during online parent coaching.

When we talk about accountability with our kids, we are most concerned about ensuring that the following two things happen every day with your child. First, how will you ensure that your child takes full responsibility for his actions after the fact—after the bad behavior occurs. And second, how can you get your child to th ...

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