SCARS ALONG THE WAY

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Is there any detail of your past life that you’re keeping from your spouse out of fear that if they found out, they would feel differently about you? What might happen if one day they were to find out about it? Most people who answer those questions I pose respond with, “Well, I hope they never find out and we won’t have to deal with it.” Does this sound like you? Are you keeping historical information from your spouse that could damage your relationship later?

I suggest you pull the curtain back and, “Reveal to your spouse any information about your personal history, particularly events that demonstrate personal weakness or failure.” This is what Willard Harley (His Needs, Her Needs) calls HISTORICAL HONESTY.  It will, no doubt, be difficult to have this conversation (or multiple conversations) but you must have it in order for your marriage to have the freedom it needs to grow, develop, and mature. The fe ...

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  • Josh Warren

TO HUSBANDS: THE BENEFITS OF LISTENING TO YOUR WIFE

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My wife is wise and my wife loves Jesus. For me, these two traits qualify my wife to make great decisions for our family that I don’t always see as beneficial. I encourage other husbands to determine similar traits in their wives.

Trust that your wife isn’t against you when she has a different opinion than you do. Discerning whether or not she is intentionally disrespecting you can be tricky. She may have been hurt by something you said or did or by something you didn’t say or didn’t do and she has reacted to a specific situation versus a personal attack on you as a person. Don’t let your ego get in the way of what seemingly may be good feedback from your wife that you just don’t want to accept. When my wife says something in which I disagree, I know that she isn’t out to get me. She ultimately wants the best for me. I need to make sure that I’m looking out for her best interest too. When our wives talk to us and say something ...

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  • Josh Warren

QUALITY DATE NIGHT

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My wife and I recently had a date night together. It was nice to be able to just talk. There were even a few moments when it was just silent. That was nice too. We started the date out by eating at a little Thai restaurant, then we got a birthday present for my son, and ended the date by getting some dessert at a different restaurant before heading home. It wasn't too flashy. We didn't go shopping the entire time. We took longer to eat. We talked about business and family a little, but kept it to a minimum. Although, I wish we had more dates, I know that we are in a season of our lives with our young children that we can't go out every week. We just don't have the ability to pull that off at this point.

However, we believe that regular healthy dating is necessary for an ongoing healthy marriage relationship. Each couple can determine what "regular" means to them depending on what season of life they are goi ...

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  • Josh Warren

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